I have a friend who believes that computers are a way for the government to take bytes of information about us and squirrel it away for some future date when we might become members of the exclusive Homeland Security Club and be locked up behind virtual bars due to our nefarious deeds on the Internet. Personally, I don't have anything to hide so I'm not afraid of Big Brother looking into my cyberspace. I do, however, take offense at some of the ways techno tricks have replaced hands-on humanoid behaviors, i.e., email wedding invitations. If you enjoy me enough to ask me to witness the nuptials, for which I will have to buy myself a new outfit and you a gift of $50 or so, eat cake with fields of diet-busting frosting, and drink cheap champagne, you can at least send me the invite via the post office. I'm worth the postmark. And recently a friend of mine received an email from her boyfriend of 4 years stating that he no longer felt "comfortable" dating someone he had no long-term interest in...one of those "it's not you, it's me" breakup bullshit lines. Sort of like being cut, pasted, and copied right out of having someone to kiss on New Years and back into singlehood. Worst of all, the Monday after last Thanksgiving I was laid off via email from a job I'd enjoyed for 7 years. In less than a few sentences I'd been deleted from the working class and double-right-clicked into the black hole of the unemployed. And guess what? You want unemployment in this state (Arizona), you have to apply via Internet. I'm beginning to forget what a human face looks like.